It's right old folk should be depressed
now Heaven's relegated to myth;
no haven now for those oppressed
by the sad decline to death.

Less superstitious, atheistic,
we suffer still the pains of illness,
so scientifically fatalistic
where ignorant faith was bliss.

Now fearful of what future's left
and vainly struggling to cope,
without the promise of after-life
we haven't even hope.

We humans think we're so bloody clever,
the peak of natural evolution.
Then how is it that we clearly never
learned the process of hibernation?

Do we enjoy the freezing snow,
cold rain in the face, the fingers numb,
the chill in the chest when the winter winds blow -
just enduring till warm days come?

We try to enlighten the dark winter scene
with some event always tempting near -
there's Harvest Festival, Halloween,
bonfire night, Christmas, New Year.

But everything's been commercialised
as just a temptation to spend more cash.
Tradition's changed when firm's realised
it's the perfect chance to enhance their stash.

Sure, fireworks may spark up your life
but its wearing, when you're nearly broke,
to have to indulge your kids and wife
and watch your money go up in smoke.

And it seems to me that everyone loathes
anything colourful brightening their day -
everyone wrapped in their dullest clothes,
black and brown and dingiest grey.

I'm fed up with cloud and drizzly murk.
I really don't want to get out of bed.
No way do I want to go to work.
Why can't I just stay home instead?

I feel like I'm getting too depressed.
I wish I could hibernate today,
settle down for a few months' rest
and sleep the winter away.

Attractive only as taboo;
elsewise a rather ugly view
when spread, so flabby vulgar -
a woman's precious vulva.

Dermatology

What is this sad disfigurement
that scars a beautiful face ?
What is this inflammation so
infects the human race ?
More serious than a nettle rash,
some type of dermatitis ?
Or maybe it's a sort of eczema
that needs a diagnosis.
Life threatening psoriasis or hives ?
Certainly no port wine stain from birth !
But which of these diseases best describes
the spread of Man across the skin of Earth ?

A Pecking Order

My garden restaurant clientele
are loyal regular customers;
ethically diverse they vary
in their characters as well.

Cocky sparrow boys push their way past
timid uncomplaining dunnocks;
busy bluetits move so fast
they leave their greater cousin flummoxed.

All alone in a polka dot dress
a poor old thrush repeats herself;
nearby a posing blackie blessed
with as good a voice shows better health.

A hubbub of new arrivals heralds
the locally infamous Finch's clan
(quarrelsome green, bejewelled gold)
who soon get in their usual flap;

more respectable dapper chaffinch
none the less hints a secret life;
mysterious bullfinch home on leave
from spying comes to find his wife.

A gang of noisy starlings enters
respecting nothing for street cred,
baiting jackdaw for her headscarf,
calling pigeon 'Old Pinhead'.

Even so they stand aside for
braggart magpie who they know
sometimes acts unwilling guide for
gangster godfather Old Man Crow.

There's only one bird lives to kill -
psycho sparrowhawk Mac the Knife
yet freebird robin unafraid still
whistles the corner late at night.

So now my story's at an end
but if you think it's been too brief,
what you must do is just suspend
some feeders and your disbelief.

Cathartic ?

Does porn really exorcise demons
or merely exercise them ?

"Look straight in my eyes or you'll have bad sex."
she said as she stared and we clinked our glasses.
I tried to be clever and quickly replied
"There's no such thing as bad sex."

"You speak as a man or you wouldn't say that.
The things I could tell you about my ex.
He thought he should do just whatever he liked
and walked over me like a doormat."

My joke had misfired but I didn't turn back
and I asked her just what did she mean.
"I'm not even sure you would understand
considering how stupid you've been.

But maybe it's due to the male situation
being different for humans and animals.
When young men want sex and then find they can't get it,
it's the women they blame not more powerful males.

Resentment builds up and the feeling develops
that females are something to conquer.
Sure, men fall in love but when tenderness fades,
underneath there's a layer of rancour.

And matters get worse now the internet shows
pornography freely available
for men can't resist the temptation to watch
women making debasement saleable.

What once were perversions are now merely tricks
which men expect women to do as of right;
when randy they can't think of anything but
the thrill in their heads and the twitch in their pricks.

Without any love sex becomes domination
with too many women demeaned and degraded
and even in love men vent their frustration
on women presumed to accept being jaded."

I started to feel I had heard quite enough,
recalling some times when sex hadn't gone well
for my wife because I had enjoyed being rough.
I stood there embarrassed and guilty as hell.

"Alright." I admitted, "My comment was wrong.
Apologies both for myself and your ex."
"Well, thank you." she said, "But I'll bid you 'so long'.
Just remember my eyes and Don't Do Bad Sex."

Posted by Michael at 01:35 0 comments