Famous Photos

Don't travel the world to see the sights

made famous from iconic photos

for when you get to the actual places

either they look just as expected

or more likely they don't look as good.

The photographer who took that shot

had the skill to choose the best angle possible

judge the quality of the light

select the apropriate exposure

to make the photo a delight.

But you, dear traveller, take pot luck

on season, weather, time of day.

Your photo really won't match up

but does it actually matter much

as long as you show that you were there ? 

Rotovating

Rough digging in the autumn months,

to take advantage of winter frosts

can help the soil environment

at very little cost.

But rotovating in the spring

will probably do harm.

Although the earth looks fine and firm,

pity the poor worm.

The dancing mirrors the disco music

Weight on left foot, shift to right

(try to keep the royalties light)

keep on facing the same direction

(rhythm's enough, just repetition)

back to the left foot, look around

(give 'em the funky disco sound)

shift to right foot as before

(time to raise the volume more)

shuffle between left foot and right

(keep the sme sound all the night)

To aliens it might seem rather comic

(monotonous as metronomic)

As long as there's sufficient drink

there isn't any need to think

and everything will turn out right.

(another groovy disco night)

It made my day !

I've lived in the same house some decades.

House martins used to build their nests

mud balled above the bedroom windows.

The stream behind the house had sticklebacks

and therefore occasional kingfishers.

Water voles used to swim in the stream

tunneling their nests into the banks.

But the stream was canalised to stop it flooding.

The martins couldn't glue to plastic.

And all that wildlife vanished.

But the frogs still spawn in the nearby meadow

and I always fetch some spawn or tadpoles

to my garden pond (as others do)

before the scrape dries up (quite often)

and all the tadpoles there die.

Frogs are clearly still surviving

and I have found one occasionally

hiding on my council allotment

across the other side of the stream.

But today was quite a wildlife special.

Never before have I found there

a newt.

It made my day.

Mediocrity

Preposterous art, pretentious poems,

potboiler novels, repetitive songs

are routine products of creative minds

that can't make masterpieces every time.

What is the English national flower?

Though roses look and smell so beautiful,

truly aristocrats of flowers,

perhaps something more representative,

more able to weather stormy showers,

a bit more common and down to earth

might be more appropriate as ours -

dandelion or daisy ?

Plenty of fish

Sure, so there's plenty of fish in the sea

but that doesn't mean there's any for me.

Sure, what I catch will depend on my bait

but nothing so far has reached my plate.

I've had lots of nibbles but nothing biting,

curious circling but nothing striking.

I might do better if I could use wealth

but I'll be lucky to even use health.

I could try deceit and mention youth

but some-one would soon discover the truth.

I can't use fame with an unknown name

and as for humour, it's only a rumour.

No matter how much I trawl the web

I fear I'm just too much of a pleb.