It seemed a good idea at the time -
a car drive round Australia.
They said "You're too old."
I said "What the hell.
I've always been a bit of a failure.
Now before I'm dead and cold
I want to do something well.
Along the way I made several friends,
young women in particular.
They said "You're so brave."
I said "Not at all."
and avoided most talk vehicular.
"But I always give a cheery wave
to drivers who think I crawl.
They'd give me a sort of thumbs-up sign
but use their middle finger."
One girl was outraged -
"To a man of eighty !"
Now I don't want to be a pommy whinger
but eighty's not my actual age -
it's my speed in k p h.
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